“So, how is work?” I asked.

“Work is boring,” he replied. “I mean… I’m still learning new things. But there is something missing. I feel that I’m not giving it my best because it is not my passion.”

“So what is your passion?  What do you want to do?”

“I don’t know any more.”

Does it sound familiar to you? If it does, you are not alone; in fact, you are similar to most people in this world. The above friend of mine works for one of the world’s biggest and most powerful companies. He is a smart, kind, wonderful guy who earns a decent livelihood. However, there is something inside him whispers to him that he is not happy, this bothers him, but he doesn’t understand what it is, and why he is not happy. His job doesn’t fulfill him, but he doesn’t even know what he wants.

If whatever we are doing doesn’t make us happy, our ladders are leaning against the wrong wall. We should come down, shouldn’t we? But no, we are making progress! Our parents, neighbors, friends and Facebook connections are clapping their hands at how far we’ve climbed, how close we are to make a name for ourselves, to become somebody! Yes somebody, but not ourselves.

But we are afraid. If we climb down from that ladder they will no longer love us. And worst, we will no longer love ourselves. Without the ladder, without being somebody, we feel insecure, deprived, unworthy. Then it all gets too much. We tell ourselves that our discontent is nonsense. That being a good citizen, a good employee, a good son is noble. We keep climbing.

Doing nothing is better than busy doing nothing.

That is the teaching of Lao Tzu, 2500 years ago and still valid. Give it some thoughts because it is important.

About the friend of mine above, I told him: “You need time. Time to rediscover yourself.”

That’s what he needs. That’s what everybody of us needs.

Time to escape the hamster wheel we are stuck in. Time to do nothing “useful” or “productive.” Time to listen to our breath, our heartbeats, our bodies, ourselves and do whatever inside prompts us to do. Time to experience total freedom. Time to be nobody. Time to just be.

A month, 3 months, 6 months or a full year, whatever you can afford.

It is not about sitting on a cushion and mediate. It is also not about giving in to leisure impulses and spending all days watching TV or playing video games or shopping – good way to avoid living. It is about standing up, going out, experiencing what you are, taking off the social masks and showing other your bare naked skin.

I don’t know if this is the only way to rediscover what we are made of. But it sure is a great way. I tried it myself. Choosing to have a pause was the best choice I’d made in 2014. Perhaps, the best choice I’d made in my life.

My pause started in July 2014. I’ve learned so much about myself, my dreams, my talents.

I’m no better than you. I’m a bag full of insecurities. Almost every day I doubt my writing. I don’t know if I will ever fully get rid of this bag. But getting rid of the bag is not the point. The point is taking one step at a time forward. Anyhow. No matter how heavy your bag is. One day at a time. One teeny, tiny, little step at a time.

When you begin to allow yourself the time to experience total freedom – which means to be yourself – your dreams will start whispering to your ears. Like how Steven Spielberg put it, dreams won’t come at you shouting. There will be something inside you that guides you and whispers what it is that you want to do. There is no way that you will fail. It is inevitable. You cannot fail.

Keep looking, don’t settle.

has become one of the most known quotes from Steve Jobs. For a long time, I’d liked it because it sounded cool. Only recently I understood what it is all about: Keep looking for what you really want to do, don’t settle.

Happy New Year my readers. May you keep looking.